Alexis Couser
Lynchburg
Word Count: 297
My tired eyes widened as my father's
truck stopped abruptly at the end of the dirt road. I saw, for the first time, the sun-glazed
Southern landscape of Lynchburg, South Carolina. Lynchburg, despite its eerie
name, is the origin of the Couser family and the home of my oldest
ancestors. I entered an old house and was quickly greeted by ringing gospel hymns
and the aroma of fresh biscuits. My ninety six year old aunt, Aunt Flossie, and
her younger brother, Uncle Vernal, welcomed my parents and me with warm hugs.
I spent the entire day with Uncle
Vernal and most of the night with Aunt Flossie. Uncle Vernal was a farmer. His
muscles stretched his thick flannel shirt and overalls. He took me out to the
field and I quickly learned that he had to time for taking water breaks or stopping
to explain his farming techniques. However, he taught by example and it did not
take long for me to catch on. Aunt Flossie had a frail build but was compassionate
and wise. During her extensive life, she had witnessed the Civil Rights and
Women's Rights movements, world wars, poverty, and a host of other significant
events throughout history. That night, we discussed many topics ranging from
Southern recipes to living in poverty to the importance of education. She gave
great advice and I valued her wisdom as well as her humility.
During the car ride back home to
Maryland, I thought about my time in Lynchburg. I could now see the reason for
my parents bringing me to Lynchburg and meeting my distant relatives. They
wanted me to see where I came from. I was inspired by my Aunt and Uncle's
lifestyles and I developed a deeper sense of self after travelling to
Lynchburg.
Travelling to Lynchburg has allowed me to develop a deeper sense of self.
I think your story is good overall, but I guess you can show one or two effects the trip had on you instead of just saying "a deeper sense of self."
ReplyDeleteI agree with Jie. Maybe you could expand on what you mean by "deeper sense of self" but you may not have to since you will go over the word count.
ReplyDeleteElaborate with deeper sense of self. I think you could go into how knowing your ancestry has impacted your day to day life. Cool story though.
ReplyDeleteGood use of imagery! I also think its important to get in touch with ones roots. Other than a few grammar errors, I don't see any problems
ReplyDelete